How to create more ALASAN

The current issue that I usually 'debate' with boyfie is "Bilekah saye mau apply kerja di KL dan juge bile saye mau pindah??" hehhee isnt it interesting topic?;p As my 'DEGIL' is so well known, thus I can still have a lot of reasons why I need to delay, even tho has been discussed for quite several times. Sy pon pelik juge mcmane sy bole byk sgt pk knape sy xmo pindah dgn awal ye. Tp surprisingly, I'm not able to tell all the reasons to mr boyfie. Seems like all stucks in my mind and my tounge freezes when I try to talk bout it. Apekahhh??
So here are my reasons to tell ya (indirectly tell mr boyfie;p)

1) Sy mls nk cari keje w/pn kt website sj huhu
2) Sy xupdate lg resume sy.
3) Sy segan nak bgtau team lead nak put her name as referee sbb sy baru sj keje 7 bulan.
4) Sy rs sy masih belum dpt pape knowledge and masih lemah dgn job scope sy.
5) KL jem time nak g keje. Means sy kene g keje awal, means sy kene bgn awal. (isk..isk..isk..which i really have problems utk bgn pg ye)
6) Intel has no formal attire requirement and flexible working hours. Suke..suke..suke sbb sy mls nak iron baju dan juge suke bgn lambat so gi keje slalu lmbt tp suke balik keje awal;p
7) Intel bole WFH w/pon sy xpenah try nak WFH tp nak raye nnt sy nk WFH sj huhuhu
8) Intel is very genorous in giving bonuses even tho to a new hire like me. I got two bonuses olredi in June and July (w/pn sket sbb kene bahagi dgn brape bulan keje)and waiting for another bonus in Dec *ngeee*
9) Nk jual share yg Intel kasi in Apr'09.
10) Benefits yg Intel kasi agak bes where a lot of recognitions given means more $$, a lot of things can be claimed, etc *Intel turns me to be materialistic;p*
11) Mgr cant shout at you and even if to ask for help from you, need to do it professionally with your willingness.
12) I got a new mgr yg sy rs ok *hihi*
13) Sy mls nak cari rumah sewa lg dan mahu berpindah randah seorg diri sunnguh menyeksekan ye.
14) Sy memilih nak keje mane, which company, what's the environment, what are the benefits, etc Sy sungguh choosy tp tiade pengalaman dan juge result yg hampeh
15) Sy takut I will be frustrated if I failed in the interview or hardly to find a suitable job for myself.

Eh byk pulak reasons sy ye rupenye. Sbnrnye ade lg, tapi xkose sy nk tambah dh *huhu* Tapi..tapi..the major reason yg menghantui diri sy ialah sy takut utk keluar dr keselesaan yg sy dh dpt skang ni, sy takut utk kecewa dan sy takut utk memulakan segalanye smula. SY TAKOOTTT!! Jika sj sy dpt support utk mengcomfortkan sy, help me with updating the resume and searching for jobs, and i dont know what else that i will need, kan bes kan..kan? *sigh* Tapi sy tau sy ni byk sj komplen with no action like my ass glued on the chair, w/pn sy tau sy ini independent dan mampu je nak buat kalo sy mau. Hati..berilah kekuatan!

And accidentally, one of my fav blogger wrote a nice motivation quotation which says like this.

“Chin up. Put your shoulders back, walk proud, strut a little. Don't lick your wounds. Celebrate them. The scars you bear are the signs of a competitor. You're in a lion fight, Stevens. Just because you didn't win doesn't mean you don't know how to roar.”

Nways, I do know how to roar but just that I'm a loser, and not a winner *sigh* Kate P Ramlee pulak;

Berkorban apa saja.
Harta atau pon nyawa.
Itulah kasih mesra.
Sejati dan mulia.

Shall I say, Mr Boyfie: "Anything for u, i'll do!" tp lps bonus eh..eh? *ngeee*